This was me at age 17 and about 100 lbs, oh to look that good again!! LOL
First off, I want to say that our fellow Blogging friend, Kathy at My New Beginnings, got bad news today after her Upper GI. After over 9 months of being totally Unfilled, the Doctor came to the conclusion that there was no change in her condition. :( Since her Doctor's Office is in a different town than where she lives, and he is opening a new Office in her town this month. They made another appointment for her at his new Office in 3 weeks, giving her time to decide if she wants to keep the Band UNFILLED forever, or to have it Removed. And if so, whether or not she wants to consider changing to the Gastric Sleeve or have the RNY Surgery.....I believe that she is still in shock. Please click on the link I provided above, and give her the support she really needs right now!!!
Now as to my post title, well....I have been reading up on some blogs, and I feel like I need to fess up. Most of you have battled obesity most, if not all of your lives. Although I have battled obesity for many years, over half of my life now, I was not really considered an over weight child, teenager, or young adult. I didn't become truly overweight until my later 20's. But once I started to put on the pounds, they just kept coming on. That's when I began my roller coaster ride of weight loss attempts.
I was probably considered mildly overweight in Jr High School (9th Grade), when I weighed about 135 lbs. I was (and still am!!) 5'3" tall. And of course I would be thrilled to weigh 135 again!! But I never considered myself overweight back then, and I never had other kids making fun of me for my weight. But as Summer began before I was to enter High School (grade 10), I decided that I wanted to lose a few pounds before I started High School, just to look a little better.
So I went on a self imposed diet....I allowed myself one meal a day (typically Dinner), I called it my water diet. I drank water all day long (duh). And I willed myself not to eat any sweets, or junk food of any kind all Summer!! I lost from 135 lbs, down to 89 lbs in less than 3 months! I would have continued losing too, as I truly didn't see myself as others saw me. I know now that I was borderline Anorexic. I felt that I needed to lose at least another 5 lbs. But one of my Uncles saw me looking at myself in the full length mirror in my bikini that day, saying just that to myself. And my Uncle told me, "girl, you don't need to lose weight, you don't even HAVE a figure anymore!!" And he was known for liking to look at pretty women.
This made me take a real-long-look at myself in the mirror. That is when I began to see what others saw, when they looked at me. My Collar Bones protruded, as did my Rib Cage. He was right, I was too skinny. So I allowed myself to gain back up to a weight between 98-100 lbs. I was in the Drill Team in High School, and we practiced all the time. So I became very toned. We practiced during our Gym period, then we had after school practice at least several times a week, plus, I was in the small competition group, so we also practiced in the evening at the Drill Team Captains home.
Because of this, I was burning calories faster than I could take them in!!! I literally ate at least 4 meals a day. I ate at least 2-3 bowls of cereal for breakfast, then my Stomach would start growling before lunch! It was so loud that I was sure that students sitting near me in class could hear it! Then at lunch I would eat a full meal at McDonald's. Then I would eat an afternoon (full meal), again at McDonald's after school and practice. Then I would eat dinner with the family around 9 pm!! If I gained up to 105 lbs, I dropped one meal-one day, and I immediately dropped back down to 100 lbs!!
So of course, I felt like I could eat anything and hold my weight!! But after I had my daughter, my whole body changed....all I had to do was look at food, and I could gain weight. But still, until I started to work full time, and became much more sedentary, I was able to control my weight. Then my later 20's hit, and so did the weight.
My biggest problem now, is that I CRAVE things!! If only I could control myself like I could as a teenager....my biggest problem is when Walt is away. If only he wasn't so strict with me, and allowed me to have an occasional treat, more often than Walt thinks is justified, then I wouldn't feel so deprived and want to go overboard when he was away from home....If only they could come up with a pill that could control our cravings!! Everything would be perfect! Believe me, the Head Hunger is the worst part of losing weight....any suggestions??? Please???
Well, I should go. Till next time.....
Aloha My Friends :)